The Problem With Pride

The problem with pride is that pride thinks it is self sufficient. Pride creates a false sense of worth. The prideful mindset loses sight of just how much other people helped contribute to their individual level of success. After reaching a desired level of status, when pride takes over, the individual begins to believe their own delusional self-talk which convinces them that they can do anything all by themselves. This false self-actulazition causes these prideful individuals to become insensitive to the value of others and they are prone to continually criticizing everything that seems to be even the least bit wrong. Their sense of judgement is clouded by their pride and the alienation of human resources becomes an acceptable behavior because they now believe they are much smarter than everyone else. Pride becomes a barrier. Pride becomes a destructive force and the prideful individual will do damage, perhaps irreparable damage, to the very things that they are seeking to improve such as relationships.

Being proud of accomplishments is fine and should be an exhilarating experience. Working toward and achieving a goal along side other like-minded people is one of the most fulfilling experiences in business and life. When we all pull in the same direction amazing things can be accomplished because we have collectively overcome the obstacles and challenges that were in the way of the desired outcome. A degree of caution needs to be a part of every victory because in the light of winning some people become so enamored with the  "limelight" that they are blinded to the other people in the room! Suddenly the only voice they hear is their own. Pride has taken over their sense of judgement and is leading them down the path of believing they are more valuable that they actually are. One of the classic mistakes any leader can make is to believe, mainly because of pride, is that they are the most important piece of the solved puzzle. Puzzles are uniquely pieced together and every piece is individually crafted to serve a vitally important function.

Take pride in your collective and individual successful accomplishments but do not allow pride to take over your judgment process. "Pride serves to serve only pride"; and that is a dangerous and destructive self-inflicted wound. Be proud, not prideful and be smart enough to learn the difference.

Watering Dead Plants

One fine sunny day while I was mowing my lawn I noticed my neighbor watering their lawn and decorative plants with their water hose. Interestingly and to my amazement they began to water, rather liberally, a plant that was dead and was going to remain dead, no matter how much water they dedicated to the dead plant. The plant was dead. Their good intentions were not going to change anything except the wasting of their time and valuable resource, such as the water. They needed to accept the fact that the plant was dead and in order to make a positive impact they needed to pull the dead plant up by the roots, add some new soil and replace it with a living plant. Then they could water and make a lasting and positive impact. 

Business and life is sometimes like my neighbor. In business and in life we can dedicate time and valuable resources to activities that are dead or dying and need to die. Instead of taking a more beneficial approach by accepting the fact that the efforts, no matter how well intentioned, are not going to make a difference. And even if they did, just how much time and effort would we need to dedicate to   see if, in the end, our energies were well allocated. There are appropriate times that we all need to walk away from something and move on. The grass is not greener on the other side, the grass is greener where the grass is growing and gets watered at levels sufficient to give the grass the best opportunity to thrive. Dedicating time, energy and resources to anything that is not going to produce a positive result is bad enough but dedicating time, energy and resources to things that are dead or need to die will bring into question the quality of your judgement. Most often we continue doing these non productive activities because we inherited them or because we always have. Stop and consider if you are too close to the situation to make a reasonable and fair evaluation and if, after doing so, you come to the factual conclusion that you need to zoom out and take a look do so. The far away look may show that the dead activity is a waste of time and resources, you were simply too close to see it. Then you can replant, replace and replenish with the opportunity to produce more positive results.

The Black Eye

One of the most important things to remember about a black eye is that at some time or another we are all going to get them and eventually the visual and/or emotional impact of a black eye is going to go away. Ideally, what ever circumstances and resulting visual or emotional impact resulting from what lead to the black eye and the associated damage, will long be remembered and have a positive impact on our lives and the direction we are headed. Black eyes are a tough way to learn lessons but they are better than not learning at all. The sudden and forceful event that resulted in a black eye is memorably shocking and that is good!

Life has a funny way of getting our attention and through some "black-eye" event remind us and teaches us what we need to learn in order to get better. The "black-eye" moments are those moments that dramatically get our attention and scream for immediate action. We must do something right now because of the damage and perhaps that is true. But what is more important is that we immediately accept that the damage done will highlight something that we should improve on. The changes necessary to prevent these "black-eye" circumstances from reoccurring can be positive steps to learning how to and how not to.

There is no victory in allowing "black-eye" events to change your goals. Move on by accepting the reality that the event did occur, there is visual or emotional damage and proceed toward a change in your life that will result in positive outcomes. The victory is found in your response and how willing you are to accept that a mistake was made, you put yourself in a challenging position and got walloped because of that decision and you are going to change so that you never allow that to happen again.

Being in the wrong place at the wrong time in a racquetball court while playing doubles. 
I do not play doubles any longer. Lesson learned. 

Really?

Really? "Really", is a popular refrain these days regarding a disbelief of a statement or action or absence of action. When someone has the opportunity and the potential to accomplish something and choses not to do so because they are lazy, feel free to look them in the eye and say; "Really?"

The fundamental problem with lack of progress most often resides more in omission than commission. When you are doing something, there is a possibility that you will make mistakes. Feel free. When someone decides, consciously, to not do something, they may feel secure that they are avoiding mistakes, but they are wrong. Once you know what to do you must do it. Make mistakes, lots of them, but reduce the number of times you make the same mistake. Learn by doing.

Lazy I don't get. Taking a break, I get. Taking a day off, I get, Taking your well earned vacation, I get. But lazy I don't get and simply cannot tolerate lazy. The best course of action is to take action. People will follow you if you demonstrate confidence, even if you are headed in the wrong direction.

History is rife with stories of very talented and capable individuals who did absolutely nothing. History is also rife with less talented and less capable individuals who accomplished amazing things by taking action. They weren't lazy, they did not make excuses and they did not accept the status quo.

Fortunately for the successful people in the world, we have lazy people as examples of what not to do. Being lazy is a really bad decision but at least it is a decision. Being lazy is a good example of a bad example. So, if you are going to be a lazy person be a really good lazy person so all of the "doers" in your world can see, by your inactivity, what not to do.

For all of you people that are not lazy, always change the roll.

Back to Basics

My former boss, a newspaper sports writer in his previous life,  used to tell me all of the time: "If it ain't blockin' and tacklin', we probably don't need to spend much time on it." Football requires that teams effectively employ the basics of blocking and tackling in order to put their team in a position to win. So does business.

Often businesses and people, after they reach a certain level of success, feel a compelling need to change what they did that made them successful in the first place. They were once passionately engaged in doing the basic actions required to succeed in their chosen endeavor and somehow, not doing those things began to make sense. The change in doing the successful basic actions probably did not occur overnight. Failure nor success rarely happens quickly. Instead, the players became complacent doing the day to day actions that resulted in measurable progress and felt that they could surely make things happen more quickly if they would fundamentally change what they had been doing successfully. When this calculated change occurs and things don't work out it is typically the process that is faulted and not the people. After all, they reason that it was the same people involved now as when they were making progress. So if could not be the people, it must be the process. Disillusioned to say the least.

The things that helped to make you successful are they very same things that will ensure a greater level of success, if you get better at those things. Let your competition travel down the road of unproven processes hoping to make light-speed process. There is a reason that the basics are called basics. The basics are the fundamental building blocks to every successful foundation. When you hear companies, large and small, talk about "getting back to the basics" consider just how much they have allowed their foundation to erode  by deliberately walking away from the fundamentals of "blocking and tackling. The negative results are self inflicted wounds that are 100% preventable.

Consider those actions that are basic to the success in your professional and personal life and commit to getting better at those things. Do change, but not for the sake of change. Change by getting better at the basics, not back to basics.

Want & Need

We were fortunate as children to have two sets of Grandparents. Each set of Grandparents were noticeably different although as children we hardly noticed the stark-worldly-differences that would, later in life, be readily apparent. One set of Grandparents were poor and the other set were well-off. The material value of each set was, in the eyes of us children, never more apparent than at Christmas. The less fortunate set of Grandparents would always give us what we wanted, toys. These toys were never expensive but we didn't care, because as children what the toy represented was all that mattered. The well-off set of Grandparents would ALWAYS give us clothes. Not the trendy clothes we might have tempered the insensitive gift with, but we got basic stuff like underwear, socks, shirts and pants. These gifts were not what we wanted, they were the gifts that we absolutely needed. I can't prove this, but I'll bet that my well-off set of Grandparents spent time with my parents asking what we needed and very little time discussing what we wanted. Because what we wanted was not likely to make a lasting impact on our daily lives whereas what we needed had the potential to make a difference!

When you are dealing with people in business and in life regarding their wants and needs, you must always provide recommendations based on the level of need and not the shiny-new-toy they think they want. While this is almost always the path that will be the toughest to take, it will surely prove to be the wisest choice. You must first start with discovering the difference between the want and the need and that discovery more often that not comes through close observation and asking the right questions. Someone may want you to prepare a presentation for them when what they really need is for you to show them how. You may want someone to do something for you when what you really you need is help learning how to do it for yourself. Socrates said; "What we need to learn to do we learn by doing."  You must be willing to give the instructions and help based on needs and you must be willing to accept the help based on needs and not give or get that which is wanted.

Late

This is a picture of vultures hanging out in a graveyard. Now we all know how vultures feed themselves, so they are wasting their time here because they are, of course, late. These guys represent: opportunity lost, simply because of missing a manageable timing issue.

Once while listening to a national TV talk show host, I caught the tail-end of a discussion about someone trying to determine why they were always late. No mater how hard they tried, seems that they were rarely, if ever,  on time to anything. The importance of the meeting did not seem to matter either. They were just as late to high value meetings as they were to low value meetings. The host listened for several minutes as this individual shared the many justifiable reasons they were late to everything! After a few seconds the host asked: "Why do you think your time is so much more valuable that anyone else's?" The individual was highly offended and proclaimed that they did not feel, at all, that their time was more valuable, they simply had so much to deal with that they found it almost impossible to be on time. The host countered and said: "Of course you think that your time is more valuable that anyone else's, otherwise you would not waste the other persons time by being constantly late."

When you are on time, you demonstrate your commitment to the value of the opportunity. Being on time is almost always a matter of proper preparation. Whatever the planned opportunity, make certain that you have factored in enough time to get ready with everything you need to make the most of the meeting, but that you also factor in enough travel time (walking down the office or driving across town) to arrive early. Get to the meeting, ready and early, it matters!